seanwillson.com

how do you know you have no time for yourself? when you haven’t worked out in over a week, your not eating right, your not spending time with people close to you, your grumpy, your tired, and you are working around 15 hours or more per day at work. welcome to the last 4 weeks of my life … no, i am no unhappy. in fact i am loving work. i am however happy that the crunch time is over and things are back to normal. being off the program for over a week put a toll on me. i was very moody, short, tired, and had little to no energy each day. the only way i made it through the days was with caffeine and the knowledge that once it was over i was going to be back to my normal routine or exercise, eating right, and taking some time for me.


i did observe one important thing this past week or so though. over the past 5 or so years i have noticed a few patterns about willson men. we are generally very loving and friendly but there are periods of time where that all changes. during that time we are either angry, tempered, short, rude, or some combination of those. now, what does this have to do with past week or so. well for about 5 or more years i followed those patterns, pretty much to the tee. that is until january when i started working out and eating right. the combination of an outlet for my frustration along with control over my blood sugar levels controlled my mood, my mind, and my overall state of happiness. i was no longer short with people, i didn’t lose my temper but on only a few occasions when anyone would have, i was very open with people and willing to listen to all sides of stories before commenting. well, that was until about 2 weeks ago when i had to stop the program due to work constraints. well needless to say the old patterns were back … i fell right back into the like a rut that was always there. that is not to say they control me, but i am now even more aware that they are with me as a trait of not only willson men but of people in general. when you lose control of your body you lose control of everything in your life. your mood changes, your personality changes, and your outlook on life changes. gaining control of your body gives you the power to take control of your life.


so last friday, after thanksgiving i started back on the program. i am eating right and exercising as usual. trying to do all exercising in the morning and when that’s not possible i do it in the evening. i have returned pretty much to my “new me” mood which is nice. i had a killer upper body workout on friday that i am still feeling today and on sunday i obliterated my lower body. i am not sure if it was the week or so without exercise but i do know i am feeling it now. having trouble walking let alone sitting and standing from a chair. gotta love it when your body sends you messages after a good workout. i love it !!!


so lets see, what else … the family is doing well. had a relaxing time with them over thanksgiving break. had thanksgiving breakfast with my mother and then went to my aunts for dinner and the next day i went with ellis and christina to her grandparents for another turkey day. good eats all around … it was good seeing everyone again. i hung out with mike and lori a bit this weekend as well. they got approved for, made an offer on, and the offer was accepted for a house. they are moving in mid december. i am so happy for them … it feels good to see good things happen to my great friends. i know they have wanted a house for a while … so this is a dream come true for them.


i got a new computer … i know i know … like i really needed one right? well i did … i was soooooo tired of rebooting that old one and trying to figure out why the friggin thing was not working. so instead of extending the grief past the year or so that i have had it i decided to instead buy a new one and sell the old one for parts. so far i think i have sold almost everything and gotten a surprising amount of money for everything. the new computer ran me around $2200 from alienware and i will be making about $700 or more dollars off the parts from the old computer. not to bad … the new computer has a amd 1.0 ghz thunderbird processor, 256 mb of pc-133 ram, 60 gig hard drive, plextor 12/10/32 plexwriter cdr-w, creative labs sound blaster live value sound card, nvidia geforce2 gts w/64 mb ddr 4x agp video card, koolmax video cooling system, pci 10/100 ethernet card, and a cool silver keyboard and case. not to shabby i think. the machine flies to, the boot process takes all of like 20 seconds.


starting after christmas i am getting my finances in order. i already kind of started but i realize that with christmas coming up i will be spending a few dollars for gifts. anyhow, i am going to be saving every spare penny for a house. i have a friend at work who will be selling his house next september (he is having a new one built) and i want to buy it. i checked it out a few weeks ago and dammmmnnn was this place nice and it was huge to boot. it was about a 2000 square feet townhouse with 3 stories (basement, main, and upper story). the basement is wide open, the main floor has a 2 car garage, bathroom, kitchen, dining and living area and the upper floor has 2 bedrooms with their own baths, the master bedroom and bath are frigging huge and there is also a nice area upstairs for a computer area. it is like a cubby near the stairs … hard to explain. anyhow, i fell in love with the place and i am going to do everything within my power to get the cash together to buy it. that means less trips home and less going out on the weekend next year. i am willing to make that sacrifice though for a home of my own.


lets see, what else … amy and i are doing well. she has not seen to much of me this past month with me working my ars off and all. things are moving along better, slow, but better then before. i don’t know about anything any more and instead i am just going to live this relationship one day at a time, make no assumptions, be happy like we are now, and just kind of go with it. what happens happens.


not sure if it got it all but if not i am sure i will update it in a week anyhow …

it seems that i have forgotten to update my web site. i have been extremely busy at work these past few months. i know that is not much of an excuse but the good thing is that i enjoy doing what i am doing at work now. that is a big step from where i was in the past. anyhow, everything in my life is going fairly well. i will dispense my life happenings now …


the trip to las vegas for the olympia expo 2 weeks ago was really a ton of fun. we (amy and i) flew out on friday and arrived early in the day. we made our way to the luxor, checked in, and then started checking out the strip. after wandering up and down the strip a while, checking out the casinos, we did a bit of gambling. i made a little playing craps, beginners luck i guess. we then went to the ms fitness and ms olympia show. talk about dragging something out. this show could have easily have been one hour long. but no, they had to drag it out to three damn hours. the fitness/gymnastic routines were really impressive but to be honest the rest of it was pretty boring. after the show and a little gambling we crashed late. up early, breakfast, and then off to the expo to check out the goods that were being offered. there were so many hotties there it was unbelievable. i had a hard time keeping my mouth shut and my neck was hurting from swiveling about … hehehhe. yea, i know most of em had some surgery or another but damnnnnnnn is all i can say. the goods were out and about. after getting our free supplements we dropped them off at the hotel and then did some more gambling. made a bit more at craps, more beginners luck, and checked out the strip some more. that night we saw the mr olympia competition. the posing and the men were really impressive. a bit unhuman in size but still they had impressive bodies. there is no way they reached that form without some kind of drug enhancement but even so, they were frigging huge. again, weider managed to drag out a one hour event into three hours with award presentations, special speakers, and a history i could care less about. it’s bodybuilding for god sakes, not the history of world war two. after the show we dressed up and then proceeded to the strip to lose some cash. i lose most of my earning up until then but it was fun. i pretty much gambled for free in vegas. anyhow, we went back to the hotel and went to sleep late. up early again, more food, did more strip surfing all day and then on to the plane for a red eye flight home. in all i had a great time and definitely want to go back. i could not believe the amount of money that was changing hands in vegas. it made me want to cry seeing old rich guys dropping 5k on a hand of blackjack. what the hell they were thinking i have no idea.


i went home last weekend and caught up with ellis and christina. it was the first time i had seen them since they got married. felt no different, they always felt like they were married to me anyhow … they get along great and complement each other well. anyhow, i heard all the ins and outs about the honeymoon and checked out some cool pictures they took. they had a really good time on the boat and want the rest of the family to make a trip together next year. it’s a good idea … just not sure about my cash then … we shall see.


i consolidated my debt and lowered my interest rate on it as well. i am trying to get my cash in order so i can start making some more investments in my future like creating a portfolio, getting a house some day, and getting the cash to start up my training business. i gotta start somewhere and getting my credit cards and other debt in order is as good a place as any to start.


the parlano move went really well. we moved to our new location this past monday from the divine offices. we now have an entire floor (39th) or a building a few blocks away from the old building. when i first saw it a few months ago i was not to into it but now that i have been there a few days i love the place. getting out on our own, in our own environment, and free to control everything is a huge win for the company and for the development team. i think we are going to do some kick ass work in our new office.


i have been spending a lot of time thinking about my future as of late. trying to figure out where i am going and where i want to be a year from now, 5 years from now, 10 years from now etc. i have not made any long term goals, outside of my body changes, but i do know that things now are not where i want them to be 1 year from now. i am trying now to figure out what i need to change or how i can get to the place i want to be. something is missing, some spark of life or something. i am not just not sure what it is …


my exercise program is going ok. i am not seeing many losses on the scale but i know stuff is happening underneath. i took 4 days off for vegas and pretty much just pigged out and relaxed. got right back on when i got back though and have been rocking ever since. i am now back to doing all of my workouts in the morning which is working out great. when i work out in the morning i have so much energy all day and i am not constantly worried about when i am going to workout. i can just do anything and everything that i want during that day without that nagging feeling that i might miss a workout. i am trying to eat more complex carbs as well … i bought a steamer for the new offices so i can do some cooking at work. i think that is going to help a lot … cooking rice and eggs and stuff at work instead of nuking it. anyhow, i am trying to get back on track for my 15 pounds every 6 week loss. i am not sure if i can reach that given that i am getting closer to my goal but damnit i am going to give it a shot.


well i think i racked my brain and got everything. till next time ..